Tag Archives: pain

Burn the Ships

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Burn the Ships title image

Burn the Ships

A couple months ago I heard a song for the first time called “Burn the Ships”, by for KING & COUNTRY (video below). I got really excited to show my son the song because he had just told me the story about the Spanish explorer and conquistador, Hernán Cortés, who burned his ships to give his men motivation to fight. I never remembered learning about this story before.

He had actually learned it from his baseball coach this year. In fact, it’s one of the team’s mantras this year. You see, last year the team made the state playoffs but just missed making it to the championship game. This year their coach didn’t want that to hold them back. He said they need motivation just like Cortés’ men did in order to conquer the new land. They have to fight in order to survive.

For the baseball team, the metaphorical ships are their past (the past losses, being an ordinary team, almost winning, etc.). They needed to burn them down, get out of their shell, and fight as a team this year. To symbolize this, the team huddles up and shouts “1-2-3-BTS!” (BTS=Burn the ships) The back of their hoodies this year also say “Burn the Ships”.

Hernán Cortés-Burn the Ships

Cortés was said to have burned his own ships upon arrival in Veracruz, Mexico in 1519 to prevent the retreat of his men. This would send a clear message—that there was no turning back! After doing a little bit of research I discovered that Cortés, in fact, may not have actually burned the ships. There is some dispute about whether or not he burned the ships or instead sank, scuttled, or ran them aground. Additionally it is debated whether or not he actually spared one ship to send to King Charles V in Spain with a portion of the treasure from his conquest.

Regardless of the “how”, it is evident from history that the ships were indeed destroyed. Thus, the result and reasoning remain the same…to prevent retreat and ensure his men were committed to their mission. Cortés knew one thing: retreat is easy when you have the option. Therefore, to burn the ships is to cut all sources of retreat. Consequently he removed any obstacles that could potentially hold his men back from giving their full effort. The message? “Succeed or die. We are not leaving this place alive unless we win.”

A reminder to me

This reminded me of a particular time that I too had to burn the ships at one time. 10 years ago our marriage was in a deep and dark place, to the point of separation and divorce papers. It was very broken—beyond any repair that we could humanly do. Only by God’s grace, forgiveness, and power was our marriage restored.

Tattoo rings...symbols of what God has done

My tattoo ring is a reminder to me of what God has done in my marriage

We symbolically burned the ships when we literally burned our divorce papers. (I had a picture I was going to post of us burning them with fireworks on the 4th of July, but I can’t seem to find it.) My “ship” was divorce, and by burning that it took that option off of the table forever. Then on our 15 year anniversary, five years later, we re-committed with another symbolic (yet quite permanent!) declaration by getting tattoos on our wedding ring fingers as a reaffirmation of our vows.

Last month (December 2019) we celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary. The traditional “gift” for 20 years is china, so I made Eric a mosaic out of a broken piece of china of my grandmother’s. This mosaic represented how God made something new and beautiful out of something very broken. This was only possible because we committed to burn the ships and decided to look ahead to the possibility and promise of something new.

Mosaic china heart

Mosaic china label

Still need reminders on occasion

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Is God Enlarging Your Capacity?

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Is God Enlarging Your Capacity?

I mentioned recently that I’ve been coming across a lot of opposition in a variety of areas. At times it’s seemed a bit overwhelming, and it started getting me to question why I was getting hit with so much. My boss at the college where I teach even joked with me not long ago saying, “Why are you always the one getting all of these weird, off-the-wall situations?” To which I responded, “You know, I’d really like to know the answer to that!” Well…I think I got it.

One morning after teaching one of my classes at Glory House, I was visiting with Ms. Susie, the Executive Director, about all the junk that I had been dealing with lately. During our conversation I said, “Why am I ALWAYS the one getting this stuff and having to deal with this stuff?” Ms. Susie answered quite frankly, “God is enlarging your capacity.”

Then I was like, “Oh no! I’ve been praying exactly that–for God to enlarge my capacity!” (insert face slap) I had prayed those exact words “enlarge my capacity”. These things were happening as an answer to my own prayer…an indirect answer of course! God didn’t just enlarge my capacity. He allowed me to encounter challenges that would stretch me and force my capacity to increase, to make my normal capacity boundary lines larger. I guess this is kind of like when people warn you not to pray for patience! Because you don’t just automatically get patience, you get opportunities for your patience to grow.

Our capacity must increase

About a month prior to this conversation, I had done a Bible reading plan about growing leadership capacity. In the plan, it said that in order “to see our dreams fulfilled and to continue having influence in God’s Kingdom, our capacity must increase.”[1] It talked about facing challenges, pressure, and stress to adjust our ability to manage those things (because we need to reach our potential). We don’t get rid of these things by running from them.

“The key to increasing your capacity is to decide you will allow God to work in your life, to stretch you beyond your comfort zone and enlarge your capacity to overcome challenges.”[2]

Easier is not always better. This reminded me of a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. It HAS to go through the struggle and the challenge of fighting its way out of that cocoon. Those stresses and pressures against it are what enable it to become stronger. Without that process, the butterfly would be too weak to do what it was intended to do, and the same is true for us at times. Sometimes we need the struggle to make us stronger and to enlarge our capacity and ability to accomplish the things that God has called us to do.

Sometimes we need the struggle to make us stronger and to enlarge our capacity and ability.

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Making room for growth by enlarging capacity

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Wounds Heal But Sometimes There Are Scars

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Wounds Heal But Sometimes There Are Scars

Have you ever experienced some kind of pain or trauma in the past but have since recovered and healed from that? Do you have reminders, triggers, or stimuli that bring that past pain up again? Does that mean that you aren’t completely healed? Not necessarily. Personally, I don’t think that this automatically means that you aren’t fully healed. Now, as a disclaimer, let me say that this most certainly could be the case, and that some healing might still be in process (as healing IS often a long process, especially when wounds are deep or trauma is severe). However, I also believe that there are times when wounds heal, but sometimes there are scars left behind.

Even after healing, there may be times when we still experience some subsequent pain. There might even be some external or internal triggers to prompt further pain or remind us of an old injury. There may be some additional healing and recovery to be done. Then again, it may just be a scar serving as a reminder of a wound that once was there.

Let me give you an analogy…an old basketball injury

Several years ago my husband, Eric, completely damaged his ACL and meniscus in his knee. “Obliterated” was the precise word the doctor used. Eric experienced excruciating pain at the time of the injury, and the pain lasted for quite some time. He eventually had surgery replacing and repairing parts of his knee, yet afterward he still experienced some pain for a while during the recovery process. He also had ongoing physical therapy for a while. Again this was all still painful, but the pain gradually diminished as his wound healed.

Though he now has permanent scars, over time the knee was completely healed and the pain was completely alleviated. However, it’s odd because there are times when the weather might trigger a flare up of pain in his knee at the scars. Even though the injury is healed, there is a trigger for pain from time to time. The pain doesn’t last indefinitely, and experiencing pain again doesn’t negate the fact that his injury is completely healed. Nevertheless, because of the old injury he just still suffers from subsequent pain on occasion even after healing, and sometimes there are external triggers that might cause a renewed temporary discomfort, ache, or soreness.

Additionally, because of the old injury and the initial pain affiliated with it, he tends to favor, protect, or guard that knee a little more. He wants to prevent that pain or that same or similar injury from happening again. That still doesn’t mean he’s currently experiencing pain or that it’s not healed. He just tends to be a little more cautious and careful—he’s more aware. He may even avoid some of the activities that were involved in the injury to begin with.

Wounds we experience, the scars left behind, and subsequent pain even after healing

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