Why Losing Doesn’t Make You a Loser—Part 1

This past weekend my son’s baseball team played in the end-of-season championship tournament.  They made it to the final championship game.  Those little guys played one of the best games they’ve ever played, and their competition was tough.  Boy, was it a nail-biter!  It was actually a bit stressful to watch.  Anytime a mistake was made, there were gasps because we knew every move mattered, and every play counted.  It was a very tight, close game.  My husband, Eric, is one of the assistant coaches.  At one point nearing the end of the game I asked Eric, “Are you nervous?”  His reply kind of surprised me (especially since he’s such a competitive spirit!).  He said, “No.  It really doesn’t matter if they win or lose.  Either way, I’m already really proud of them.  They’ve played a great game.  I couldn’t ask for more.”  My friend sitting next to me leaned over and said “Good answer!”  Eric knew that losing wouldn’t make them losers.

In the end, our boys did end up winning. 🙂 The final score was 5-4.  Ball caps were flying in the air.  Parents were jumping out of the stands.  It was very exciting.  However, I remembered my husband saying “it really doesn’t matter if they win or lose”, and even though they won, I completely agreed.  We were all so proud of how they played the game.  Even if they lost, I think it still would have been a win in a way.  Winning is good but maybe losing is sometimes okay too.  You see, not everybody who loses is a loser.  Sometimes it’s the game or the process, not the outcome, that matters.  Sometimes we learn more in losing.  Sometimes a win is disguised as a loss. 

It reminds me of times in my life where I experienced losing, but in the end it was really a win.  I can think of examples throughout my life where this has proven to be true.  I remember trying out for the cheerleading squad when I was in junior high.  I didn’t make the cut.  I was devastated about losing, and I felt like a loser.  I will never forget something that happened that day though.  Continue reading →