Tag Archives: relationship advice

Make Others Feel Taller NOT Smaller

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Make Others Feel Taller NOT Smaller! - Great post from HappyHealthyandProsperous.com

Make Others Feel Taller NOT Smaller

Most people are drawn to the type of people who make others feel taller not smaller.  People like to be around other people who make them feel better about themselves.  In general, people pull away from and don’t like to be around those who make them feel bad about themselves.  Nobody likes to be around people who are cruel, mean, and rude (especially if that’s their typical nature most of the time).  This type of behavior is a sure-fire way to cut people out of your life!  It’s like the wrong end of a magnet repelling people…pushing them away instead of drawing them in.

People are drawn to those who make them feel good about themselves.  On a side note…Did you know that’s a significant factor in why many people have affairs?  It’s not that they necessarily like the other person that much.  It’s that they like themselves better when they’re around that person.  In affairs, those other people (i.e. affair partners) make them feel better about themselves.  

People like to be around other people who make them feel better about themselves.

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Someone made me feel smaller

I have been around people who have made me feel smaller NOT taller on a number of occasions.  Several years ago, I was involved in a situation that, quite honestly, made me feel like crap.  I was around someone who felt the need to “tell me the truth” because “true friends tell the truth”.  It made me feel very badly about myself, about how I looked, and about the mistakes I made.  I honestly felt I couldn’t do anything right, and even when I tried, that too was criticized.  It had a tendency to make me dread being around this person in particular.  Have you ever felt like that?  It’s pretty miserable.  Thankfully, I’m getting better about dealing with these feelings (okay…after a few tearful moments), but the initial feelings are very real nonetheless.

After being on the receiving end of hurtful situations like this, I wanted to make sure that I’M not a person who does this to others.  I wanted to be sure I was the kind of person that will make others feel taller not smaller.  So, I compiled a list of “Do’s” and “Don’ts” of practical steps that each of us can take to make sure we are NOT the kind of person that is like the wrong end of a magnet that repels people.  (I actually compiled this list on my phone at 3:00 am in the morning after the bad experience I mentioned earlier because I couldn’t sleep due to being so hurt and angry!)

I, too, have been guilty of making others feel smaller, not taller

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Importance of the Right Friends

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Importance of the Right Friends

Importance of the Right Friends

“The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.” (Proverbs 12:26 NIV)

In the previous post we talked about the importance of choosing friends wisely. More specifically, we discussed avoiding unequally yoked friendships. We focused primarily on what it means to be unequally yoked in close relationships. However, we did not spend a lot of time on the reasons why we should avoid these kinds of friendships. Therefore, in this week’s post I’d like to spend more time on the importance of the right friends.

When discussing unequally yoked team animals or draft animals, we mentioned that the mismatch can cause the animals to veer off path or course (even going in circles). The disparity can also lead to burdens on one or both of the animals, a loss of strength and energy, a loss of momentum and forward progression, a slower speed, and basically the animals are working against each other preventing both from completing the tasks set before them.

This is also true when we don’t have relationships with the right friends. Bad friends can endanger our course in life and turn us away from the right direction. They can also cause us undue burdens, deplete our energy and strength (mentally, emotionally, AND spiritually). Not having the right friends can slow us down and hinder our progress in life.

Friends can impact the direction of our life

We must guard our hearts when choosing the right friends. The bible says our hearts determine the course of our life. Therefore, not having the right friends (who affect our heart) can have a tremendous negative impact on the course and direction of our life.

“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Proverbs 4:23 (NLT)

Motivational speaker Jim Rohn said, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” Similarly, there’s another saying that goes, “Show me your friends, and I’ll show you your future.” Both quotes allude to the power that friendships have on our progress in life and in our future.

Our friendships have significant impact on us. There are negative ramifications and consequences when we don’t have the right friends.

Here are a few listed in scripture: Continue reading →

What 15 Years of Marriage Has Taught Me…

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What 15 Years of Marriage Has Taught Me...Just a few things we've learned over the years

What 15 Years of Marriage Has Taught Me…Just a few things we’ve learned over the years…

By Eric & Tracy Robbins

“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”  Matthew 19:6 (NIV)

Eric and I just recently celebrated our 15 year wedding anniversary.  I thought it might be fun to share what 15 years of marriage has taught me.  So I invited Eric to write this post with me to share some of the things we’ve learned over the years.  Some things are fun, and some are serious.

One of the first things that 15 years of marriage has taught me is that when you’ve been married this long and have gone through a lot together, you’ll do some crazy stuff!  In honor of our anniversary we decided to celebrate by getting “ring tattoos”.  A friend of mine said, “Pain to symbolize the pain of 15 years?” 🙂 Like many marriages, we really have had our fair share of pain though.  I’d do it all over again, pain and all–that’s how much I love this man!

What 15 years of marriage has taught me... You'll do some crazy stuff together, like get ring tattoos to celebrate!

15 years celebrated with ring tattoos–Shout out to Josh at Davis Street Tattoo in Dallas for taking such great care of us!

 What 15 years of marriage has taught me – Eric:

  • That you shouldn’t joke or say things facetiously that are negative to your spouse.
  • That when your wife knows she’s right, you probably shouldn’t bet against her…be it music artists, a certain date or a sitcom theme song from the ‘80s. 🙂
  • That when you’re at a restaurant and you order something that looks good, your wife will want a bite.
  • That when you have a nice sweatshirt that’s comfortable, your wife is going to want to wear it.
  • That it’s very beneficial to identify your wife’s love language and use it. This will only work to your benefit—showing them love in their love language, not just your own.  (see this post here)
  • That when your wife is tired, hungry or hormonal, you should just back off and give her some space. And definitely don’t say anything about why you think she might be so cranky.
  • That sports aren’t the most important thing in life. (Tracy just said, “Yeah, apparently you have to have time for hunting and fishing too!”)  After watching football on Saturday, Sunday, Monday and Thursday, maybe you shouldn’t watch the World Championships of Curling on Friday…might be best just to let that one go.
  • That when your wife says, “I don’t care”, it really means, “no”.

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